Additional guidance for facilitators

Group time

The task of the Group Facilitator is to show the way by walking it themselves. Group Facilitators are responsible for facilitating the session and simultaneously working on their own unhelpful behaviour.

It is our experience that openness and honesty in the group is entirely dependent on the Group Facilitators’ openness and honesty. It is therefore of fundamental importance for the Group Facilitators to share their own experiences, thoughts and struggles. The Group Facilitator is also the first to give their reflections on the questions and exercises associated with the Step.

It is important that the Group Facilitators do not act as experts, but honestly share their own struggles in going through the process. Honesty and humility are the main prerequisites for completing the course, and having those characteristics promoted by all co-facilitators enables everyone to move forward.

It is also important not to become dogmatic and judgemental in relation to participants’ individual views and interpretations of God. It creates room for non-believers, new believers and mature believers alike to participate in these group sessions.

It is the Group Facilitator(s)’ responsibility to intervene if the Guidelines and principles of the group time are not being respected. For example, if a group member comments or gives advice under the guise of talking about their own lives, or if someone speaks for more than 3 minutes.

No dialogue

During the group time, each person speaks to themselves, for themselves, and about themselves in the presence of God and other members of the group. Speaking to themselves means that they look into their own life as if in a mirror, answering the questions and describing what they see. They can investigate their own life and say what they see, but they don’t have to explain why. The group can listen but does not need to understand. No one interrupts, comments or gives advice. This means that the participants do not engage in a dialogue with one another. They talk to themselves and to God. In the meantime, others may identify with their experience in their own reflections and if they wish, they can use it and put it into perspective within their own lives.

This group format means that everyone can share their thoughts and concerns in an uncensored and unstructured way, because in principle, no one needs to understand what the other says, and no one interferes in the process the other person is in. Each can calmly relate their thoughts and experiences. At the same time, others have the option of listening and reflecting on how these thoughts may put their own situation into perspective and even contribute new insights.

Individuals do not have to listen to what others share if they would rather concentrate on their own thoughts. They do not need to look at the speaker either. In our experience it is actually best not to seek eye contact with each other, which can actually be very liberating. To help people not to look at each other we recommend having a flower or a candle on the table, so participants have something else to focus their eyes on. When online, you could suggest people may find it helpful to light a candle in their own home, or alternatively they are free to look away from the screen, if that is more comfortable for them (so long as the screen remains on).

Top Tip

Prohibiting dialogue in the group can be an unfamiliar situation for many, and thus seem a bit alienating, especially at the beginning of the journey. Our experience is that most of the participants begin to really appreciate this group style as the sessions progress.

Safeguarding

Alongside confidentiality within the group, each Facilitator and co-facilitator should be aware of any safeguarding policy and practices your organisation/church has (if running it under the umbrella of such organisation). If you are concerned about the safety of an individual or the wellbeing of a child or vulnerable person, or if you become aware of any illegal activity, then you have a duty to share your concerns as outlined in your safeguarding policy. Please see below STEPS Safeguarding Policy and Best Practice document for guidance on this.

If you are facilitating a group outside of a church or organisation, and there is a safeguarding concern relating to your STEPS course, please direct your safeguarding concern as soon as possible to the appropriate local authorities and/or, if appropriate, the emergency services such as the local police.

The role of the host

The host provides coherence by being visible and accessible throughout the course (whilst in smaller courses it is likely the Facilitator who will take on this role, in larger group settings this could be another Facilitator). They welcome participants at the start of the session and deal with housekeeping issues. The host welcomes and guides the participants through the session. The host may, for example, share their own emotions and internal resistance to doing the Step related to the session to let participants know that their feelings are recognised and understood by the team.

The host will also be responsible for the practical things, such as making sure people have the link to purchase the book, the film links, and also in the planning of the Step 5 day.

At the first session, the host explains the structure of the course and reviews the principles of sharing in the group (the Group Guidelines), ensuring that everyone receives the same information about this.

Follow up with co-facilitators

The host ensures that there is good support and backup for co-facilitators, so no one feels alone in the process.

An important element here is that all course sessions are evaluated (this takes place by facilitators staying on the call at the end of each session to de-brief, and are concluded by asking for God’s protection and blessing). If possible, it is a good idea to have a group of intercessors involved in praying for the participants and the facilitators in the lead up to, and during the course.

Communicating between facilitators and participants during the course

In addition to talking through with participants what they want to work on at the Introduction Session, the group facilitator(s) act as a contact person for their group for the duration of the course (see Appendix 10). In this capacity they are responsible for helping with questions and sharing their experiences through conversations outside of the group time. Since there is no conversation in the actual group time, this availability ensures that participants receive the necessary support and have the opportunity to have a conversation about their personal issues if needed.

In addition, the Facilitators are also the ones who will be available to hear participants’ confessions, after they have had their own confession talk with a co-facilitator. (See Step 5 and Appendices 4, 5 and 6).

We set out below the value of such communication during the course, although from our experience typically only around 20% of participants ever take up the offer to call their Facilitator outside of the group session, and if they do, such conversations typically last no longer than 10 mins. We do not encourage long conversations, as the Facilitator’s role is not to give advice, it is more to listen (see below). Please do make this clear with participants when you offer such calls.

When doing online courses, we particularly recommend offering this to participants as it allows for a chance to connect outside of the group structure.

Using the phone during the STEPS process is one way of acknowledging the need to share our lives with another person.

When participants choose to call a facilitator, they are given the opportunity to verbalise their feelings, thoughts, reactions and actions. For example, they may call when they are sad, angry, disappointed, confused, anxious, or lonely, when they would tend to want to isolate themselves, or are injured. They may have had an ‘aha’ moment, insights, revelations, or need to share their Step work with another person.

Top Tip

As a Facilitator, our role is primarily to listen. By listening we give the other person the opportunity to speak and thus enable him or her to reach their own solutions if possible. If it seems natural, we can share experience, strength and hope with the person who called. For instance, you may say: “I don’t know what you should do, but in a similar situation, I chose to…”

Experiences, strength and hope can also be used to encourage the person to remain in the STEPS process in spite of the circumstances, or to remind them of some of the promises which are the fruits of working with the 12 steps.

We do not give advice and do not make comments, since we have already acknowledged that we do not know what is best for the other person.

The person needs to have space and be allowed to be exactly where they are in the process, without the intervention of others. They must be able to walk the road with God and take the decisions they deem necessary for their lives.

You may wish to send Participants information on how conversations with Facilitators are treated (See Appendix 10).