My name is Wendy and I am working on the issue of judging myself harshly.
I was brought up in a home characterised by conflict and negativity. The atmosphere was one of teasing and sarcasm.
This led to insecurity, self-doubt, defiance and rebelliousness and fractured my relationship with my parents.
Through my teenage years I sought affirmation and acceptance in unhealthy ways until I became a Christian and understood for the first time in my life that I was loved unconditionally.
Sadly, over time I put caveats on God’s love, imposing a high bar on my conduct that I couldn’t live up to. I prevented myself living in the good of my faith and my sense of failure affected all of my relationships, especially my marriage. Knowing that I couldn’t shake off my negative view of myself, I sought change through STEPS. On the Step 5 day, I recognised that I had a wrong view of God, how he views me and how he wants to relate to me. This was a significant turning point in my life.
The STEPS process helped me to develop a new intimacy with God and the tools to build more positive habits of thought and behaviour. Understanding that God likes me has helped me to feel more secure in all my relationships.